I wrote a really long post yesterday and ended up trashing it because I couldn’t get the words right. And I am not sure I will this time either. But, I am gonna put this out there any way.
So, here it is… we all have those people on Facebook who tell us what a great parent we are, but do they truly know? They are hundreds, if not thousands of miles away and judge us by what appears on Facebook.
They don’t see the days we have short tempers and yell at our kids. The days we are angry at ourselves and life and in order to make it through the day, your kids eat, fruit snacks, granola bars, chips and whatever junk food they will feed themselves.
Try as you might, but whether you’re a stay at home mom or one who works 40 hours a week, this parenting shit. isn’t easy.
Early mornings to make sure poop isn’t being smeared on your cedar chest, diapers are being ripped off and floors being peed on.
And then there are the late nights trying to reconnect with your significant other because you work almost opposite hours to prevent spending your whole paycheck on childcare.
Add in the rough nights where your kids wake up screaming because of bad dreams, getting stuck or just waking up and it’s dark.
You’re bound to lose it sometime. And sometimes it losing your patience with your kids and other times it’s losing energy and motivation to clean your house.
Sometimes it’s a combination of the two.
What people don’t see is how you don’t want to be this person–you’d rather be the mother who enjoys staying home, doing crafts with your kids and has everything together. You want be a Stepford wife/ mother in some ways.
But, that’s not how it works. You’re not always the person you wanna be. So, while you look like the most amazing parent to some people and a complete wreck to others–hang in there.
We are the moms they didn’t warn us about. Aim for one thing to work on each day. And if you fuck up in the first five minute, try to get past the next five doing better.
They don’t tell you that you won’t get much sleep, that you’ll look and feel like a raccoon, that sometimes you feel like you’re in it alone, or how much you may hate yourself or dislike the way your kids behave–it may feel like you hate them, but you don’t. But, your human and you need a break too.
You have to remember that you matter and take care of you. You can’t help others if you have nothing left in you to give.
So decide the most important thing you want to be as a mother. And aim for five good minutes at a time.