Late Night Revelations

Last night–after a crazy day! And I do mean crazy… Handyman was supposed to show between 9-11, called at 10:30 and he was running late, went out for lunch around 12-1, 4 children at an understaffed restaurant waiting for food (I’ll let you paint the picture for yourself), finished around 2. Just about to leave the restaurant and got a text from my BiL saying that the handyman could do it today but, we wouldn’t be able to get into the house up 10PM or next Friday. So, reschedule for next Friday. Went to the park only to discover L had an explosion in his britches–thank goodness we were only 2 blocks from home. Home, threw him in the shower (Thankfully, he knows how to wash himself now. Gave him a washcloth with shampoo on it and he cleaned himself.) and started laundry. Naptime for 2 of 4 kiddos. Started organizing L & A’s closet (Thanks to my bigger sister and mommy who packed up clothes and sent them to me.), Z started fussing. Naptime for 3 of 4 kiddos. Finished organizing the older two’s closet (still have a box of clothes in their room–not sure if the clothes in the closet are too big for A, pants wise.), UPS showed up with a bunch of packages. School supplies stuff, the boys Glendragon Castle from Mike the Knight (currently available on Groupon), and a couple other cubes for their room–to store stuff in.

Well, that was the crazy day part–which caused this next part. I didn’t want to make anything for dinner.

Yeah, I know, lazy mom, right? Whatever!

I was thinking, tomorrow is Friday and I am ready for my weekend. I want to do nothing! I just need a break… 

Yeah, even us mom’s need those too.

But, I didn’t want to make anything–I was craving something but, was having a hard time figuring it out. I didn’t want pizza because I had it for the last two days–thank you, DiGiorno. I finally decided that Panda Express sounded good. We had had it last week and it had been delicious! So, I had decided. But, once again–lazy mom.— I didn’t want to go get it.

Typical, right? We want what we want but, we don’t want to do the work for it. I know I do this more than I should.

My a-holeness inside was screaming, just play on Facebook. It sounds good to Mr to so, eventually, he’ll just give in and go get it.

YES! I am that kind of wife sometimes too.

But, it didn’t work–see, I was hit in the face by a certain quote I came across while looking on Facebook. My plan to make Mr go get it, it backfired…

Relationships are not about demanding rights, but giving grace. Jesus says when it comes relationships it’s not about who’s right and who’s wrong, but who will step out in love.

Who will step out in love? Could I, figuratively,  just grow a pair? Or in other words, just grow the eff up! Who will step out in love? Would I be willing to step outside of my comfort zone and do something for the man I love? The true love of my life.

See, to me, it’s not a simple trip around the block and down the road. So, here it is–the honest to God, brutal trust–besides the I am lazy and I want everything done for me sometimes.

I am about to be 23 years old and I am still scared shizless of what might be in the dark.

There you go. I am about to turn 23 next month. I am a mother to three wonderful boys. But, I am terrified of what might be in the dark sometimes.

To me, this wasn’t a simple trip to the restaurant. It was a would you be okay taking the chance and possibly dying or going through something severely traumatic? 

I watch too many crime shows I am sure. No one else who just watches “normal” shows thinks like this. Right? I don’t know. But, that’s what it was to me.

Did I want to chance going out and becoming just another statistic that I watch on TV?

The big fat answer that was echoing through my head was no. But, as I came across that quote, I realized it was bigger than me and my insecurities. So, I sucked it up. Got on my shoes, threw on my coat, asked Mr what he wanted, and with a I hate this attitude, went out the door.


I did it.


I am still alive.

Nothing bad happened. It was a quick and painless trip.


That quote–that simple quote…

Relationships are not about demanding rights, but giving grace. Jesus says when it comes relationships it’s not about who’s right and who’s wrong, but who will step out in love.

It was a big Neon Sign saying, how much/what would you do for your husband? 

Mr was right. Yeah, sometimes your husband is right–whether you like it or not. When we want food, he usually has to go get it. Whether it’s fast food, groceries, or take-out– it’s him that goes to get it. He stops on the way home from the grocery store. He leaves the house to go to the restaurant or through the drive through. He drives the roads.

Last night though, I realized that I had to suck it up. I had to show him just how much he truly means to me–just how much I really love him. It’s a simple thing to do. Going to the restaurant just down the street. He deserves so much more. But, sometimes I get so focused on me, me, me! that I don’t realize it.

Last night though–last night I did.

Thank goodness I did too.

No good attitude.